Is this really a diet?

No seriously, is this really a diet or am I paying a large corporation to somehow enter my body and melt fat?  It’s early in the game, but I think I may be in love.  I have not yet felt hungry, well let’s get real, I have been hungry – but not that ‘I’m going to eat my own leg’ hungry…  I get what I want, I can still make a bad decision, but now I have to face it and then work it off.  This is golden!! Thank you 7lb 8oz baby Jesus – that was for all you Will Ferrell fans out there.  How did I miss these secrets in eating for the past 10 years?  Are these secrets?  Does everyone else know about them but failed to TELL ME?!  Shame on all of you.  Shame.

I am a new person in a few ways, and I hope it continues.  I have started planning meals and grocery lists a week in advance!  What?  This thought seriously never entered my mind before.  I would just walk down the aisles and get stuff that looked good.  This becomes a problem when you get home and realize you spent $150 on bagels, turkey, bathroom tissue, and wine.  Try to make a meal out of that… 

(Although, not to take you down a rabbit hole here, but I was watching this new show on TLC the other night where they discuss weirdo obsessions and one woman has been eating TOILET PAPER for something like 20 years.  So while I may not be able to make a meal out of bagels, turkey, toilet paper, and wine, I am pretty sure Mrs. I Heart 1-Ply would be just fine.)

Admitting that I can’t prioritize grocery shopping makes me feel like I am a sad project manager outside of work…  I can't even project manage dinner in my own house.  NO MORE I SAY!  I made a fabulous dinner last night, and the night before.  It was all healthy and so good.  Thank you Weight Watchers for kicking me in the pants.  Thank You. 

Will Power. Check.

I now need to call on the spirit of ‘please let me stay on this fast moving wagon’.  I feel like falling off a wagon wouldn’t be very painful in the 1800’s because they probably moved pretty damn slow.  If I were a horse pulling an Oregon Trail type wagon for 16 hours a day, I would be at a negative MPH.  Wagon’s today are different.  The issue is that everything moves fast in our world today.  I feel like my wagon is a 2010 Ferrari Testarossa that is traveling at top speed.  I DON’T WANT TO FALL OFF OF THIS BABY, it would hurt!!  Plus, I mean, if my wagon is a Ferrari, do I really want to fall off?

Now, how to stay on this proverbial wagon….  I have polled a number of current and past Weight Watcherites and they all seem to try back to one core piece – the ability to continue to track what you shove down your throat.  Apparently, if you are made to actually face the decisions you make, you make better decisions.  Now there’s a novel concept.  I wonder if this would work for the US Government or those crazy religious fanatics.  What about the people that continually don’t choose me to win the Mega Millions lottery?  I guess the lottery is out of the question, but defiantly holds water for the government and crazy religious folk.

Staying On the Wagon.  Hopeful Forever Check.

Today I hope everyone goes forth to prosper in their own endeavors, and please if your butt means anything to you don’t eat that second piece of cake.

Peace out from the biggest girl on the smallest legs.

XOXO